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This is the time of year that most families are gathering together enjoying the change in seasons. For parents with kids who graduate this year, like 2 of mine, the story is different.
For these families, fall is the beginning of last first’s. It is the beginning of the end of childhood, the preface to adulthood. It is the time to buckle down and get ready for college. In our family, the fall scene is college applications, college visits, communication with coaches, communication with colleges, cost of attendance, and so much more.
Yes, we still enjoy football games, homecoming, and the occasional fall activity. However, days like today, while many families are enjoying our local fall festivals, my son and I are attending an open house and recruiting camp in North Carolina. And while my son despises preview days, he is totally in his element on the mat with current and future college wrestlers.
All these trips all over the country and all the previews and meetings about financial aid and the like are worth it to see my son in his future element…a college wrestler, attaining a degree from a top-notch college, while doing what he loves the most. This is what he has worked for since seventh grade. All the blood, sweat, and tears, all the plans, all the dreams are all coming to fruition. And this visit is one of four in the next month. He has already received 4 acceptance letters, and we expect the offers to begin coming in any minute.
This did not come easy. And I did not pay a recruiter to do this. My son has worked from a young age, spending every spring and summer training, perfecting his wrestling skills. While other kids were enjoying the beach all summer, he spent his summer training for weeks for national tournaments and duals and competing in national tournaments and duals. Now, all this hard work is paying off when it truly matters.
If you have a child who is a student athlete, and you would like to know how I have helped my son without paying a recruiter to do it for me, please email me for my simple plan: “Driving the Recruiting Vehicle for My Son.”
You may do so by emailing me at
It doesn’t matter your child’s age. You can start as early as elementary school. It is a process that you will never regret!
So how do you manage senior year without pulling every hair from your head? Now that is the million-dollar question!
How to Not Pull Your Hair Out Senior Year: 3 Simple Tips
· Don’t take it personally!
· Remember he is still your baby.
· Savor every moment, good and bad. Life only happens once.
Don’t take it personally.
Amidst all the emotions, understand this one thing:
Just like you, your child is scared,
so he or she may act out of the ordinary, even to the point of pitching tantrums. Oh, yeah, we have been there this year. Kids, like adults, do not enjoy rejection. The college application process leaves room for rejection and is an eye-opening reality check into the “real world.” Often, this fear of rejection leads a kid to react defiantly, totally out of the norm. Kids are accustomed to their parent’s support and approval. When they come to the point that they may be rejected in a real-world situation that can truly affect their future, emotions can overwhelm them to a point of serious frustration. These actions are not personal toward you. Just breathe and focus on the goal.
Remember he is still your baby.
Although he may be acting like an alien, he is still your baby. He just needs more of your support than ever. Remember back during the toddler years when you had to be firm and consistent? This is no different. Stand your ground. One minute your kid will tell you he wants to go to one school. The next minute he doesn’t. This type of wishy-washy behavior is most often out of fear of rejection. Fighting does not help! Believe me, I have tried! It just runs up your blood pressure. Go back to the basics. Be firm and consistent. Above all, be his mom. Show him you love him unconditionally.
Savor every moment, good and bad. Life only happens once.
As graduation approaches, you will feel good and bad moments. Savor both! Before you know it, your kid will move on to college, then a family. Life is too short to fixate on the bad times. Be present in the moment. Last night, my son told me that we are always on the go. Very true right now. However, our little conversations about his fears and expectations about the future are dear to my heart. Teen boys especially do not enjoy sharing their inner fears. Grasp every glimpse you can of those fears to help them. Last night, my son was saying that it is impossible to take an entire course load in 4 years. This scared him. I mathematically broke it down for him, alleviating his concerns. This was a defining moment in his college search. I could see the apparent relief cross his face as he breathed easier.
Amidst the chaos of senior year, search out those special moments and love your child. And know that you will look back on these memories in the future and smile with understanding. Mothering doesn’t end in elementary school. Now is when your child needs you more than ever. No, it’s not now all hayrides and fall festivals. Now is the time your child prepares to embark on the journey to adulthood and to real life on their own. Mom, you have done an amazing job so far, and you will see the fruit of your labors before you know it.
All the best,
Song of Sapelo Sunset